Peaches

I FEEL THE NEED. FOR A NEW BLOG. (MIND YOU ITS BEEN REALLY LONG SINCE THE PREVIOUS ONE. SO DONT GIVE ME THE -_- FACE)

we all want people to see us for who we are and still love & accept us. But when it really comes down to the things we cannot bear to face and have no control over, we choke up & suddenly, we trust no one.

Everything's got a moral, if only you can find it.
-Lewis Caroll

I thought the 'high school' like drama would be over by now. Ahhh, my wishful thinking & uncaring heart. It almost never leaves, never. And if only anyone knew, about the real drama that was really happening under wraps so discreetly, life as I know it will never be the same again.

I have just about every terrible comment you could ever think of in my head right now. Let's just cross fingers I don't have this 'lizzie mcguire*' moment.

*Lizzie mcguire usually says silly things embarrassing herself unintentionally when she's unsure about how she wants to react.

Knowing my ability to lose focus, to doubt or to even question You or everything that has led me to this point frightens me. Realizing that all Ive ever been is a hard headed snob always ever so sure of myself since my 'reformation' not only stabs through the heart of stone, but force me to also realize i cannot supress the emotions and memories that make me uncontrollably fearful and angry and vulnerable all at once. The more I try or rather, not try, the more it jumps out to kill the nearest person next to me when i least expect it. Oh how irrational all of this is. Carry me God, I beg of you.

Anger will tear you down, make you less of the person you want to be.
Anger will tear apart your soul.

-Veronica Mars

This blog has been nothing but rubbish the past few months, hasn't it? Random photos or songs every once in awhile. On a better but still random post, maybe a paragraph or two on insignificant nonsense (almost as if I'm trying to have some sort of small talk with anyone who bothers to read this).

Once again, it's time for a new beginning -with poly starting next week and many many many new things to adjust to. Not to mention Children Of Light Ministry (COL) which was previously unofficially known as RCIC is now official and established! The leaders have a lot to learn before Ben finally steps down and takes the break he truly deserves. As much as it should excite me that school is starting, I'm not even so much as anxious. I do like the idea of writing and filming etc as part of school, but I guess I'm just not very into poly's system. That's why i went to CJ in the first place. Unfortunately for me, CJ was not my place so Mass Comm was my only other option. I'm really hoping I don't get group mates who are lazy because I really just want to study and hopefully do well. I'm not going to be anti-social or anything, but I think I'm more interested in getting into a local university then being part of some social club in school and ending up at.. well... somewhere not recognised. I hope my scholarship details get settled asap, it's really annoying me that I have to use this borrowed laptop first and than transfer everything over later on. Then again, the scholarship seems fuzzy now, grrr. As usual my Dad never fails to give the wrong information.

These past few weeks have been some monotonous cycle filled nothing worthy all of this spare time I've had. As usual, I waste my holidays away doing nothing productive. You know, I still have all my JC notes and books and whatever else STILL in my backpack which I dumped aside the day  decided I wasn't going to force myself to study in a place that made me so unhappy. Ironically, I don't feel happy in Mass Comm either! Joke, isn't it? But if I want to get past this stage I haven't got a choice so its better to just be mum and deal with it. Plus, I haven't really started so I shouldn't have this fixed mindset. It might turn out not too bad. Though I still feel that if I had chosen the right combination for JC, I wouldn't have left because I wouldn't have a shitty class and a shitty subject. But that's over, no point harping over it.

I found this recently, I couldn't help but go aww... chubby child HAHAHA. Actually, tiny 15 year old!

you'd notice i have more on the twins than any other kid. Ive always had this fascination with twins, secretly wishing i had one of my own.

Everyone should really try to go there on friday nights to check out  Shirlyn Tan & The Unexpected. They're realllly good live. I was especially awed by the keyboardist/violinist Joan Chew. Pizzas were gooooood too, yum. Luckily I came late, cos the rest of them waited for about 2 hours before they got a table, HAHA.

Im not gonna go for the silly freshmen camp tmr, too lazy hah

Sometimes, i really. reallllly cannot tahan val (valerie lim su ann not paulose but that one also cant tahan, shall show you another time). Read ...

Valerie says:

how about supergirls?

HAHA

Peaches says:

so many names, so little time to decide.

Valerie says:

bel why so emo

are you okay

Peaches says:

HAHAHAHAH

Valerie says:

OMG

Peaches says:

SHUT UP REALLY.

Valerie says:

HAHAHAHA

shut up girls?

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 You can’t play on broken strings
You can’t feel anything
That your heart don’t want to feel
I can’t tell you something that ain’t real

these were either from kite flying or sentosa stunts. Surprisingly no pictures of kites since it was really too bright to take any.

1. I've had absolutely wasted the last few weeks doing nothing. I haven't accomplished ANYTHING, I'm still in the same pathetic mental state. Goodness, let's not talk about physical state; I ate junk food for days & days consecutively.

2. I worked for about 4 days (this sunday will be my fourth) out of two weeks & im going to quit because my job absolutely sucks. & also because I have feet problems & I can't stand much. My stupid job requires me to stand & look like a fool (no im not a mascot)

3. Issues with my scholarship are really annoying me, really.

4. "Lent ? Oh yea its now.." I completely let other things distract me so much that I've let about two weeks of lent go by me and I haven't really done anything yet.

5. Awfully chocolate doesnt want me btw, because I can't work on both saturday & sundays for 11/12 hours (seriously? what is wrong with her). Soooo... any primary school/lower sec kids want English tuitioning ?

6. The fine line between love & hate is sometimes indistinguishable. So much that i find myself so angry & so frustrated over the smallest things.



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He's quite an oddball. He felt the need to cover all his teeth when he did this face. We're actually suppose to open our eyes really wide but it was way too bright for that to be possible.

& then it got even brighter ...

He couldn't have been any more awesome than he was, really. Photos by Addison :) I took rubbish ones, duh. I didn't have fun honestly. My own fault & the people around me. My entire block was oldies who sat throughout the damn performance & I had my brother with me -_- Talk about annoying + I was realllly grumpy that day. But nonetheless, he was AMAZING. Better than hearing him on your itunes or whatever. EVERYONE should experience him live at least once.

Ahhhh, the thought of colouring for hours straight makes me shudder. Those were the days huh? Only the last few days of course, even though I had 8 months to do it. Mind you I only finished 5 boards out of required 7 boards & my 5 boards were all half empty so please, don't ever pull a stunt like this. Unless of course you have a flair for bullshit & a mind that's overflowing with imagination (cos then you have the option of taking Study Of Visual Arts instead of the 3hour paper), I really urge you to try & do a drawing a week. I had a B3 you know ? HAHAH I know, im shocked too. So a lot of it goes to my SOVA paper & God's grace, really. Look at all the above... thats about all i had together with a few more non coloured sketches (basic outlined ones that didnt even have shading!). So yes, I have no reason to be sad about not getting a distinction.

I just have to scream this out loud on cyber space. On thursday, 5th March 2009. Im gona be singing(screaming) along to..



hahahah, Im forever telling Joel to shut up when he gets all gaga over Jason Mraz. Its really a miracle my brother & I even have 2nd best tickets since they're practically sold out! So yes, I have every right to be shocked & very jumpy. Ok so the tickets aren't exactly in my hands right now, so cross fingers nothing happens & this time tmr they'll be mine! HAHAHA Okay homies, all time favourite below :)

 

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For whoever wishes to save his life will lose it,
but whoever loses his life for my sake will save it.
What profit is there for one to gain the whole world
yet lose or forfeit himself?"

Luke 9:24-25

ahh, how apt today's gospel is.